Should a particular romance novel, novella, or story be written in the past or present tense? (Should romance in general be written in the past or present tense?) Well ...

Some romance writers know with absolute certainty that a particular story has to be told in the past tense or in the present tense. Some people only write in one or the other, in which case: Problem solved, carry on!

But a bunch of other people get really stuck on the question of the storytelling tense--when is the story being told? during or after the narrated events? Sometimes this is a stressful decision when a writer is just beginning to play with a sparkling new idea. Sometimes it comes up when someone's trying to get a handle on a draft that just does not feel right.
 
Here's my own (informed, yet personal) take on present vs. past tense for romance fiction:

• Past tense (in third or first person: She ran down the stairs or I ran down the stairs) is the default and the safest bet. If you do not care, maybe try this path first.
• Present tense (She runs down the stairs, I run down the stairs) is a legitimate and viable option if the writer A) has a stylistic/artistic/thematic/narrative reason for choosing it for a particular story or B) simply prefers reading and writing narrative in the present tense. On a really basic level, if you hate writing in past tense, you shouldn’t do it!

Readers who love present-tense narration typically say they like the immediacy, urgency, or immersiveness it creates for them. They like feeling that they’re experiencing events with the POV character, right as those events unfold.
 
Some readers, writers, and editors feel that the present tense works better for stories with a high level of action and/or emotional intensity throughout.

For other readers, present-tense narration is a noticeable enough style choice that it’s actually distancing, taking them out of the story. That experience might involve thinking “huh, this is in the present tense, weird: I wonder why the author did that” instead of “ooh these characters are real to me, I'm all in.” To some people, present-tense narration reads like a script, documentary narration, a synopsis, or commentary on a story rather than a story.
 
That seems to be because people are most used to stories being told in the past tense, both in conversation and in writing. It’s the most familiar convention for many of us. Because of that life experience, past-tense narration is usually invisible to readers, meaning that it does not even register for us; we're just accessing the story without noticing the verb tense as an authorial choice. Present-tense narration is less omnipresent culturally and therefore more obtrusive for many readers.
 
Some people feel that the present tense is less effective for stories that include a lot of description, scene-setting, reflection, or exposition—or that are just quieter or less fast-paced. Memories and backstory can also be less awkward to integrate into a story that's written in the past tense.

Some readers actively hate present-tense storytelling. They may outright refuse to buy or read a book written that way. Or they’ll read it but apply much higher standards to it: In other words, they might go for a really excellent novel that handles the present tense flawlessly, even though they see the tense choice as a mark against it. This doesn’t really seem to cut both ways; I don't know anyone who refuses to read books written in the past tense, or who leaves negative reviews because of that tense choice.
 
However, if your heart is with the present tense, go for it. My observation is that some people who say they flat-out won't read present tense literally don't notice it if it's done well in a book that suits them in all the other ways, and will simply remember the book as having been written in the past tense—because it was so smooth that their brain didn't trip over it as unfamiliar, artificial, or awkward. And maybe past-tense-only people are simply not your target readership!

Present-tense narration, mostly in the first person but sometimes in third, is showing up more often than it used to in romance. It seems to have become a lot more common in YA first (perhaps post-Hunger-Games?) and also may be coming from fan fiction (from which romance has gotten lots of writers and readers). This all makes me wonder whether younger romance readers may be more comfortable with present-tense storytelling and less likely to notice or object to it.
 
More broadly, like literally every narrative choice, the present tense will be more or less well received depending on a book’s target audience.

That’s all a bit abstract, though I think it’s helpful context.

But you need to find out what you think, especially in the context of a specific piece of writing, with its specific themes, tone, energy, characters, and heartbeat! Try this:
 
Rewrite two or three whole scenes from your current manuscript in the past tense if they’re currently present, or present if you’ve been writing in past. Or, if you’re in the planning stages, write the same couple scenes or interactions in both past and present. Try to choose scenes that have different levels of emotional intensity and different amounts of action vs. description, exposition, and reflection.
 
Read them. What do you think? What do you feel?

When you think of a writing group (or, interchangeably, a writers’ group), I’m guessing the first model that pops into your mind is a bunch of creative writers exchanging parts of their drafts and critiquing each others’ work. Maybe in a coffee shop.
 
If you’ve had bad experiences with a writing group in the past, perhaps these coffee shop people are being kind of competitive. Or pointing out typos in an early draft. Or striving relentlessly toward publication while cliquishly looking down on less “serious” writers.

Here are a few of the ways these groups differ from each other in how they’re run:

• Some groups are peer-led, with writers coming together to organize the group. (In some cases, one participant is some degree of in change; in others, things are more free-flowing or collaborative…or, if it’s not working well, messy.) Some groups are facilitated. A facilitated writing group is organized and hosted by a writing teacher, editor, writing coach, or other experienced person who is there to moderate rather than to act as a participant themself.
• Some groups are associated with a larger organization, like The Loft Literary Center or Shut Up & Write! Others are independent, just doing their own thing.
• Some groups meet in person, others online. The frequency and length of meetings vary, as does whether group members communicate between meetings (on Slack or Discord, in a Facebook group, via email, or in other ways).
• Some groups are ongoing, continuing for an indefinite period of time—sometimes for decades. Others are limited-term, intended to run for 8 weeks or 3 months or whatever the organizers decide.
• Some groups are free, while others are paid.
• Some groups are for people with shared characteristics or experiences beyond being writers: For example, you might join (or start!) a group for writers with caretaking responsibilities, veterans who write, or writers with ADHD. Other groups are aimed at a more general population.
• Some groups are genre-specific: for poets, fiction writers, romantic suspense writers, or scholars working on their academic books, for example. Others welcome writers in all genres.
• Writers’ groups come in pretty much all sizes, from intimate three-person situations to giant open-to-anyone online groups.

 
On top of all that diversity, what actually happens during a meeting varies hugely from writing group to writing group. Here are some key ways these groups differ from each other in activities, purpose, and tone:

• Some groups follow a writers’ workshop model, where participants share their work for critique. The point of these groups is to receive (and give!) hopefully useful feedback—and, as I said above, they’re what most people think of first when they think “writing group.” However, there are lots of other possibilities out there too! For example:
  • In some groups (which I think of as write-together groups), participants meet up to actually, literally write! These groups’ meeting mostly consist of quiet, companionable writing time.
  • In discussion-based groups, participants may talk through the challenges they’re facing in their current projects, about some predetermined writing-related topic, or about writing practices and craft more generally.
  • In accountability-focused groups, participants share their writing goals and what happened with their previous goals. They cheer each other on, challenge each other to continue moving forward, and keep each other engaged just by being in community and listening.
• Some groups are explicitly for writers seeking traditional publication, and may focus on paths to publication or publication-minded critique. Others are for new writers, writers who aren’t doing this to publish, indie authors, or people with any relationship to publishing. In this and other ways, writing groups vary in their goals—and in how clearly those goals are stated (or even if the people in the group know what they are).
• Writers’ groups also vary significantly in tone, which is super important but can be harder to figure out than the other characteristics listed here. Are the people harsh, no-nonsense, encouraging, kind, competitive, grumpy, joyful? Does the group encourage laughter and a sense of humor or play? Do the participants like and trust each other? A good fit here is so important, in part because writing is incredible personal. Know that it is absolutely okay to try a group and leave if it doesn’t feel right for you.
  

If you’re interested in finding writing community through a group, try thinking through that big list of differences above and identifying your preferences.

Remember that the point is not to find the “best” writing group, but instead to find a group that works really well for you at this moment in your life and this stage of your writing process.
 
Can you identify your 3–5 most important characteristics, or any dealbreakers? Maybe you need an online group, hate the workshopping model, and care a lot about it being queer-centered or at least enthusiastically queer-inclusive. Or maybe you want feedback aimed at getting your drafted novel ready to pitch to agents, you’d prefer to meet in person on a weekday evening, and you need a small group. There are no wrong answers here, just a handle on your own concrete needs and priorities in this moment.
 
Next, look around. Are there any such groups? Are they accepting new members? Do they seem like a fit, personality- and emotions-wise? Search online with keywords including your specific needs. Ask writers, editors, coaches, teachers, and other people in the writer world that you happen to know. Check with any writing organizations that you've had good experiences with.
 
If you can't find the right group, are you up for creating one of your own? I bet a lot of other writers want what you’re interested in finding, too. Maybe you just need three or four likeminded people, a Zoom account, and a Slack space to make your dreams come true.
 
And if that sounds like too much right now, or you want a facilitated experience, is coaching an option? Some writers find that receiving feedback, talking through issues in a project, working on a better-fit writing practice and process, or setting and reporting back on concrete writing goals with a writing coach can fill a lot of the same needs (and more) as a good-fit writing group.